dorkstrider: killerkranberry: dorkstrider: did you know that the australian government literally changed the date of australia day this year because it was on a saturday and everyone was that upset about missing out on having a day off remember when they pushed the time of the leader’s debate back a couple of hours because the final of masterchef was scheduled to air at the same time ...
belle-morningstar: Remember that time when the t mobile girl was really sweet but then virgin mobile made fun of her so t mobile stepped its shit up it’s like high school drama except with phone company’s
initiala: A little girl in my 4th grade class came up to me after recess and said, “I got married at recess!” and I said “Oh? I didn’t know anyone was ordained under the age of twelve.” and she asked me what ordained meant and I explained and then she said “Oh, well, no, my wife and I were married by the slide, but we’ll be happy together anyway.” So apparently on school playgrounds, slides are...
kdbemily: asphyxion: i went to a high school where they played jeopardy music when you had about 30 seconds to get to class and i shit you not best part of the day was seeing kids sprinting to class with this music playing hahah dope
boo-and-kitty: You don’t need to buy me expensive things or take me out to dinner every night or even every weekend. I don’t need the world or want the world. I want the little things. If you push my hair out of face or rub my back. Or if you randomly kiss my cheek. Or text me randomly saying you miss me. Or if you make a tweet about me or post a picture of us on instagram. Then that’s all I...
megvsshark: trishhyy: when a girl changes her clothes in front of you, she’s either really interested or you’re level 99 friend-zoned Or she hasn’t spotted you in the tree yet.
1500hp: the aight gatsby
svvitzerland: i cant believe sex happens in real life
the-nicest-asshole: UK grading system 75-100 A+ 70-74 A 64-69 A- 60-63 B+ 55-59 B 50-54 B- 46-49 C+ 43-45 C 38-42 C- 35-37 D 0-34 Time to move to the UK
wescalou: a b c d e f me
fatwink: sext me in mla format
juilan: Kanye West hits is head on a sign and bruises his ego